An old video of life coach Kavyal Sedani has recently been circulating on social media, in which she claims that an affair can “wake up” a marriage. Her views have been receiving a lot of criticism online.
In the interview, she says that the only thing that revives a dead marriage is having an affair. According to her, it forces partners to break down emotionally and talk openly about their frustrations with each other.
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She also adds that people should experience multiple relationships throughout their lives.
Sedani believes that monogamous relationships were created to maintain order in society. If people reproduced without structure, it would lead to chaos. She argues that this system made more sense in earlier times when options were limited.
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Many social media users have expressed outrage, accusing her of trying to normalise cheating under the guise of feminism.
At first glance, her words appear morally questionable to many.
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However, when not taken literally, the meaning behind some of her points does begin to make a bit of sense.
Her suggestion that an affair wakes up a dead marriage stems from the idea that it forces couples to confront their problems and start communicating. In stagnant marriages, change requires honest conversation—and that often doesn’t happen unless something disrupts the silence.
When viewed metaphorically—as an affair being a catalyst for open communication—the statement starts to sound less radical.
That said, having an affair may not be the healthiest or most respectful way to address marital issues.
On the topic of having multiple partners, she suggests that relationships before marriage can increase emotional maturity. These experiences help people learn how to communicate, express themselves, and be selfless in future relationships.
While choosing to spend your life with the first person you fall in love with is a valid choice, having past relationships can help individuals understand themselves better and grow.
However, this doesn’t mean one should be with every person they meet—both extremes are harmful.
In the end, people need to realise that every relationship is unique.
There’s no one-size-fits-all formula. You know your partner better than any life coach online, and only you can judge what works best for your relationship.
These tips may work for some, and for others, they may backfire. After all, you know your partner best, and communication is always key.
